Please forgive me since it has been a while since my last blog. There comes a point in the journey through cancer when a new normal kicks in, and the initial shock wears off. Cancer becomes my lifestyle, and I find myself less inclined to write; however, I will be better since I know many of you support me and want to know how I am doing. 🙂
I’m still fighting, and my weeks consist of chemotherapy every Friday, recovery on Saturday – Monday, and work Tuesday – Thursday. Yes, I am going to work! I love going to work, and I find the environment a lovely distraction from the difficult reality that is my cancer diagnosis. Sometimes when I am at work, I completely forget I have cancer. Then I ask myself, do I really have cancer? I mean, yes, pathologically I do, and I am going through treatment, but cancer doesn’t have my mind or my spirit, and that’s why I show up to work and I give my best to my students. They inspire me and motivate me to be strong. My regimen has changed to Taxol only so the recovery period is much shorter, and usually there is just one day between Saturday and Monday when I feel my lowest. My blood cell counts have not always been stable so I skipped three chemo treatments which puts me at a finish date towards the end of April instead of the end of March. I have to take an immunity booster shot now called Neupogen to help keep my counts up, and while I am happy to stay on schedule, the shot makes me achy and tired. I’ll be glad when my body can reproduce the cells on its own again.
To keep myself busy, I’ve started working on a project that I am calling metaMORPHosis. It’s a dance piece that I am setting on my advanced students at Laguna Beach High School. We are creating a piece that is based on suffering. I am drawing from my personal experience with breast cancer and the students are contributing their personal experiences which range from troubles at home to academic overload to dissatisfaction with their body image to anxiety to fear of life beyond high school. The cast is all girls, and we are working together every Wednesday to build a piece that will premiere in our Spring Dance Concert on April 27, 28, and 29. I’m collaborating with a composer and I am also creating a mini-documentary to highlight the process. When I am done, I want to be able to say that I made some art through my breast cancer journey. Art is always how I have expressed myself, and I look forward to every Wednesday when I can dive into the creative process of metaMORPHosis. I’ll be sure to share the final products with you, and as always, I appreciate your continued support.
Here’s a peek into some of the phrase work I’ve been building for metaMORPHosis … if you’re available, come to the show at the end of April! Just leave me a comment or email me and I’ll get you ticket information.