Estee B.C.

“Perhaps, this is the moment for which you have been created.” Esther 4:14 

I am not afraid. There is a tender stillness in my spirit because I know that no matter what, I am more than my body. We are more than our bodies, and yes, one may say that you have to go through something traumatic to come to terms with this, but so be it. When I lay down each night, I focus on my breath and I thank my body for another day of fighting the good fight. I thank my mind for working with me to stay focused and to stay present. Outside my window, the world keeps moving, and I too, go with the flow. Cancer is a part of the natural course of my life, and there is nothing I could have done to change this course. I am not a victim to cancer, but rather, cancer is the teacher, and I am its student for the next 7-9 months.

While there is much to learn from my teacher, I think I bring a lot of strengths to the table. Estee B.C. (Before Cancer) is a 28-year old young woman who lives by the beach and loves her job. I eat healthy, exercise daily, and drink more water than most people (hence the empty water bottles that have been filling my car since college). I’ve never worked a day in my life, and I mean it. I am the Director of Dance at Laguna Beach High School, and I am engaged to my best friend, Brett! I have two dogs – a yorkshire terrier named Penny and a chiweenie named Nico. My parents are extremely supportive and loving, and my brother, Stan, is a light to my life. He’s been with me since day one, and when I learned I had breast cancer, I struggled to imagine how the news would affect everyone I loved, but most especially how the news would affect him. We often talk about how we are going to be here for each other through thick and thin, and how if there is anyone in the world who gets us, it’s us. My brother has bloomed before my very eyes in the face of this news. Cancer is a truly transformative experience not just for the person who is ill but also for the people around that person, and that’s one of the many reasons how I know that what is happening to me, is greater than me. Having cancer has made me stop and really think about life. I see things more clearly, I feel more deeply, and I listen more carefully. Every day is a good day, and every moment is cherished.

Speaking of moments, Brett just came into the room and gave me a big hug. He said, “I’m so happy you’re going to be okay.”

I said with a sigh and a smile, “Yes, I hope so.”

He said, in a very matter of fact tone, “I don’t see why not.”

Good point. 🙂

Until next time …
Me2

19 thoughts on “Estee B.C.”

  1. Estée,

    You are the brighter star that shines in our world, I say us as all your friends and family around you to this day. You shine brighter then the North Star on it’s brightest day!! For you have taught, showed, and guilder many to what they have become, will become, and inspire to be! Your sole is so loving, so careful, and so meaningful…. You heart is so loving, so knowing of it’s presents, and so giving that we all wish for the best for you in every possible way. We all love you and i for one can speak for every single person that we know …. WE LOVE YOU ESTÉE AND HAVE YOU BACK 100% let us know what ever you need and have no doubt BC has met it’s match! El D 2006, the family, the love,the growth of us all… We all stand together as one!

    1. Chris, this comment makes me smile so much! I need to come to your restaurant in LA and see you. It’s been way too long!

  2. Only Gods grace can give someone the peace I can hear in your words. I agree with Brett, with God all things are possible. Said a prayer for you.

    I’m a Dinubain, so I know both your parents. I’m fb friends with Sara, Sally, and Karen and saw your post.

  3. Estee,
    Our family just heard of this yesterday, and we want you to know that you are in our prayers. Our daughter, Emma, sees your dad often at COS. All dads adore their daughters, but your dad’s adoration of you is unique and heartwarming. You come from excellent stock! Your attitude speaks volumes about who you are. Your faith, your strength, and your willingness to share your journey are all indicative of what cancer is up against. Please know that we Visalians will embrace your family while they walk you through this.
    Isaiah 41:10

  4. Such a touching story. You are a strong young lady and with God’s help he’ll pull you through this. Thank you for sharing. Praying for you

  5. God bless you and keep you strong. As hard as it may be continue to smile and rest your body when you can. Stay positive and if you need anything you can count on me. I love you and can’t wait for you to be cancer free again. Until then you will be in my prayers always

  6. We are starting a prayer vigil. Whoever would like to join us we are going to say a prayer for healing and strength for Estee at 7 pm cst each night. Matthew 18:119 Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.

  7. Estee,
    You are strong! You are brave! You have lots of new memories to make in the years to come, and we, Brett’s family, are excited to make many of those with you as you join our family officially next summer!! We are all here for you as you go through this challenge and become completely healthy again.

    1. Peggy, I love you guys, and I can’t wait to see you soon. Tell Mark I get to pick the next wine we drink and it has to be really fancy. <3

  8. Estee my Brother and sisters went t school with Stan. Heartbreaking to hear of your diagnosis.
    It’s been a year for me with 3 c breast cancer
    And during that year my 30 year old son was diagnosed with testicular cancer. We both had Chemotherapy and I had radiation. We are both finished he’s back to work and I have to do scans every 3 months. The most I can tell you from experience is live everyday! Stay near to God
    And before you know it the year will fly bye.
    You will be amazed at how strong you are
    And all the new people you will meet that will
    Touch your heart ❤️ forever. You have a wonderful husband and many people around the world praying for you. It’s okay to feel all the emotions that’s all normal I cried laughed was mad 😡 and a host of everything in between!
    One day at a time ! And today we’re here !
    May you have a very peaceful day ! ❤️

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